It's Not About Politics

...Okay, for some people it is. But when a politician doesn't even pass the smell test, I can't hold my nose long enough to evaluate his policies.

I'm really not into politics. I usually vote halfheartedly, shrug, and move on with my life, but this election left me grieving. I didn't want Clinton either, but I think if she won I would have been able to shrug and move on.

I'm not too worried about what Trump is going to do (and thankfully I have that luxury). I doubt he can oppress me more than chronic insomnia and fatigue already have. There will always be nutzos out there, some far worse than him. What's terrifying is the cultural climate that allowed our nation to actually honor one of these nutzos with the highest office in the land. It's the symbolism of this that scares me more than the reality. It's the messages this sends. Men have been told, Do whatever you want -- you can get away with it. Women and minorities have been told, You don't matter. The GOP has been told, You can offer poop on a stick and we will hold our noses and swallow it.

The reason "locker room talk" is so disturbing is that it's not just talk. When you have been a frequent victim of sexual harassment (if not assault) from puberty (if not earlier) until present day (as I, and I would guess most women, have been), those comments are not merely vulgar -- they threaten your daily existence. And such abuse was happening regularly before the election. Where is safety, now that this attitude has been normalized at the highest level? Is there no base level of decency?

Abuse is not about force (although it often involves force). Abuse is about control. It always requires an imbalance of power. Women as a whole have less power than men and are therefore vulnerable to abuse. And we have just given an enormous amount of power to a man who demonstrably abuses it. So many PTSD sufferers are actually triggered by Donald Trump becoming president, and this is why. (I am not one of them, but I understand it.)

Telling people to get over it and move on is asking the impossible and is maddeningly condescending. Isn't that what every survivor desperately wants to do: forget it and move on? How do you get over something that's still got you by the pussy? (Sorry, was that offensive? Didn't seem too offensive on election night.)